September 2011
30 posts
225. Carriers [Alex & David Pastor.2009.US]
Carriers came as a surprise to me, it’s a post-apocalyptic movie minus the zombies and chaotic pacing. Yet, it still manages to be a fun and thrilling romp. An unnamed virus is plaguing the Earth, and the only ones that survive are the ones smart enough to avoid exposure to said virus. Amidst this anarchy ridden landscape are four friends traveling cross country in pursuit of open water;...
August 2011
28 posts
224. The Reef [Traucki.2010.Australia]
is essentially the Australian equivalent of Open Water. I just love survival movies of all sorts, whether it be post-apocalyptic or simply a lost-at-sea epic such as this. The Reef is extremely bare bones but it minimally shows. Most films with similar budgets and themes layer the CGI effects on thick, to the point of ruining a potentially awesome premise. The Reef uses CGI to its advantage;...
223. Wild Cherry [Lustig.2009.US]
Remember the krelboyne girl from Malcolm in the Middle that was crushing on Malcolm super hard? Not really? Alex from Lost…yeah her. Well, she blossomed into a stereotypical babe on the cover of Teen Cosmo and stars in DTV indie comedies now. I remember first seeing her in the abysmal sequel to Waiting appropriately dubbed Still Waiting. She has the lead in this soulless teen sex romp...
222. Naked States [Nelson.2000.US]
Photographer Spencer Tunick is part Jew and part Hippie, but 100% dedicated to the art of photography. He is the focus of three HBO documentaries: Naked States, Naked World, and Positively Naked. Naked States is Tunick’s cross country mission to publicly photograph nude volunteers in every state. Along his journey Tunick encounters a nudist colony, a Phish gathering at an Air Force Base,...
221. Almost Heroes [Guest.1998.US]
How did Christopher Guest get swindled into directing this? It came as an absolute surprise to me when I saw his name attached to such a mundane comedy. I’d never seen Almost Heroes, and all I really knew was that it was released after Chris Farley’s death. I’m glad Dirty Work was released after this, because I’d hate to think that this was his final role. The plot is...
220. House Party 3 [Meza.1994.US]
I believe it was earlier in the year that I had the misfortune of sitting through House Party 4, bearing that in mind I ventured forth with what is considered the REAL final installment in the House Party series. Kid ‘n Play make their final appearances in what stands to be the definitive bookend of the trilogy. In a series of movies such as this, where most every comedic avenue has been...
219. Misery [Reiner.1990.US]
Misery is undoubtedly one of the best Stephen King adaptations executed by someone other than Frank Darabont. I caught the first half of Misery seemingly years ago at my parent’s house, but due to complications that I no longer can recall, I wasn’t able to finish the film. That is, until a couple days ago when I noticed that it was up on Netflix Instant. Misery is not your typical...
218. National Lampoon's Pledge This!...
Paris Hilton stars in what stands to be yet another entry in the long and shitty catalogue that is National Lampoon’s legacy. That stoner dude with the bugged out eyes from Super Troopers is the only other notable actor in this I suppose…and even his name is irrelevant. I suppose I don’t have much to complain about. It’s not like I go into these kinds of films expecting...
216. Riot [Yuen, Munoz, Di Lello, Johnson.1997.US]
This made-for-TV movie was akin to that of an ABC Family Original series. It’s essentially four films all tied up into one, detailing the lives of four individuals of different races during the Rodney King riots. The races in question are as follows (in order of how they appear in the film): Asian, Mexican, Caucasian, and African American. In a hilarious twist of casting fate, Luke Perry...
215. Stolen [Dreyfus.2005.US]
Stolen is an intriguing look at one of the most brilliant art thefts of all time. An art caper so perplexing, it remains unsolved to this day. The characters in this documentary are exactly that, like characters out of a mystery novel. The self designated lead art investigator in this case is straight out of a Sherlock Holmes book. Harold Smith, an aging art enthusiast stricken with skin...
214. The Puppet Monster Massacre [Mills.2011.US]
Never has a movie title been more appropriate than “The Puppet Monster Massacre” in terms of both plot and aesthetic appeal. The film oozes low budget B-movie goodness but with a puppet twist.
As you may have already guessed, the film is almost exclusively a blend of puppets and crude CGI graphics. The puppets all bear a striking resemblance to the same ones used on “Sesame Street.” Don’t be...
213. Truth [Barton-Grimley.2010.US]
I watched this about a week ago, and I already forget the fine details. It was pretty uneventful to say the least. The plot comes to a decidedly bizarre standstill about halfway through the film, and never makes a recovery. Basically, a well to do couple is put through a physical and psychological gauntlet after an intruder breaks into their home. It is soon deduced that the intruder has much...
212. Splinterheads [Sersen.2009.US]
Splinterheads is a fairly run-of-the-mill indie comedy with all your basic thematic structural components: guy loves girl, girl thinks little of guy, guy ends up bagging girl by standing up for himself. It had some laughs, but wasn’t at all groundbreaking in it’s conception. The acting was on par with any dark comedy such as this, the two leads we’re fun to watch, Yet, it was...
211. Ishi: The Last Yahi [Riffe,Roberts.1992.US]
A sad yet introspective look at one of the last surviving member of the Yahi tribe. The Yahis were secluded to a small section of Northern California in which they were slowly and methodically eradicated. In fact back in the late 19th century it was not only legal to hunt and kill Native Americans, it was encouraged. Native tribes were seen as “lesser humans” and prehistoric...
210. Friday After Next [Raboy.2002.US]
I’ll preface this review by saying that I’m a fan of Friday, but never actually seen Next Friday. Skipping ahead to this third installment was a big mistake to say the least. I heard that it had a small cult following so I proceeded accordingly. There’s just something about holiday films, particularly Christmas, that bring out the absolute worst kind of storylines (Bad Santa...
209. Rank [Hyams.2005.US]
Rank is a compelling documentary focused on the annual PBR World Championships, not beer follies but Professional Bull Riding rather. I’m not sure if it were the intention of the documentary to perceive bull riders as simple folk, but that’s kinda how they came across. Simple hard working folk that is, who if it weren’t for bull riding would still be cowboys or farmers or...
208. 200 Cigarettes [Garcia.1999.US]
200 Cigarettes is a look back at the year 1982 on New Year’s Eve with an all star cast of 90’s actors. The only problem I suppose is that it is blatantly a 90’s movie dressed up as an 80’s movie. Courtney Love, Paul Rudd, Dave Chapelle, Jay Mohr, Kate Hudson, Christina Ricci, Ben Affleck, and the plain Jane girl from The Goonies are all in this in equal parts. The movie...
207. Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid...
I’m not sure how many Paul Newman films I’ve carved into my belt at this point, but this is probably number 3 or 4 on the year which would make probably around 9 or 10 overall. Newman plays Butch Cassidy alongside Robert Redford as the part of the Sundance Kid in this dramatized biopic. When it comes to iconic western characters such as these, it’s all about exaggerated truths...
206. Brotherhood of the Wolf [Gans.2001.France]
This must be the year of arriving late to the party for me. There are probably a dozen or so films that I’ve seen this year that I’ve been meaning to see for quite a while now. Brotherhood of the Wolf is one such film for me. I remember the hype surrounding it way back in high school, and despite seeing it over a decade after its original release, time hasn’t diminished the...
205. Cowboys & Aliens [Favreau.2011.US]
UGHHHHHHHH. This was everything I was hoping it wouldn’t be…boring, predictable, and not anywhere near as campy as it should have been. You’d think with a title such as Cowboys & Aliens, a film would be able to deliver a hilarious good time, unfortunately this was far from that. The miscasting of Harrison Ford was one of the most glaring problems with the film, his...
204. Road to Perdition [Mendes.2002.US]
In one of Paul Newman’s final on screen appearances, he delivers what stands to be one of his most powerful performances ever. Playing the role of (fictional?) Irish mob boss John Rooney circa 1931. The stellar acting doesn’t end there though…Tom Hanks, Daniel Craig, Jude Law, and Stanley Tucci round out the all star lineup. Fresh off the heals of his critically acclaimed film...
203. Mom [Rand.1991.US]
WOW! FINALLY…a flesh eating demon with an unquenchable cannibal bloodlust on the inside and the appearance of a golden girl on the outside. Early 90’s cheese plus B-horror movie goodness = a winner in my book every time. Local TV reporter Clay Dwyer has quite the conundrum on his hand when his feeble mother is transformed into a demon who feeds on human flesh by the light of the...
202. Triple Dog [Franchot.2010.US]
Triple Dog is essentially a 90 minute long Degrassi episode, only not anywhere near as thrilling. Bad girl Chapin crashes her best friend’s slumber party where she introduces the girls to a game called Triple Dog. Essentially it’s a matter of triple dog daring one another except the consequence for not completing a dare is getting your head shaved. As the movie ventures forth, it is...
201. No Escape [Campbell.1994.US]
Ray Liotta, Winston from Ghostbusters, and the dad from Clueless star in this futuristic prison thriller set on a remote island. The year is 2044 and the prison systems are run by corporations. Having majorly pissed off the head of one of the corporations, Ray Liotta’s character lands himself in one of the maximum security prisons, which happens to be a remote island where cons are forced...
200. Valhalla Rising [Refn.2010.Denmark]
Eh. This was hard to sit through. It attempted to be this EPIC adventure when in reality it was boring and void of any depth. The film started strong but the last 45 minutes dragged on at an excruciating pace. The plot centers around a Norse warrior aptly named “One-Eye” and his loyal boy sidekick Are and their pursuit of a Crusade. Upon running into a band of Christian Crusaders,...
199. Wigstock: The Movie [Shils.1995.US]
Wigstock is an annual drag music festival that takes place in New York City’s East Village. This documentary is of the 1994 festival, so it is definitely a vintage look back to say the least. I’m not for sure whether or not this festival is still running or not, but it’s certainly one of the more unique music gatherings I have ever known of. A majority of the performances are...
198. Naked Ambition: An R Rated Look at an X Rated...
This documentary serves to show the porn industry in a different light than what most people are accustomed to. Director Michael Grecco is a celebrity photographer in the business of capturing authentic moments. He’s decided to now turn his lense on the world of the XXX industry, and what better place to do so than at the AVN Adult Entertainment Expo. In conjunction with this event,...
197. Microcosmos [Perrin,Thomas.1996.France]
Microcosmos is an up-close (literally) look at the insect world from a variety of unique and near unexplainable camera angles. Astonishing camerawork paired up with intermittent cheesy voice overs makes for a pretty awesome time. The narration is very few and far between, not to mention that it’s in French, which adds a much needed soothing/romantic quality to the film. The creatures...
